Eight hours ago I was hanging upside down from a wall. Literally.
Actually, it was quite wonderful. On the evening when we signed our lease for this home three weeks ago I happened to run into my prenatal yoga teacher who shared that she is now teaching several yoga classes for folks with back injuries - right here in our new community! I felt like there was some magic or synchronicity to running into her like that, and vowed that I would hustle my bustle to her yoga class just as soon as I could.
Thanks to moving, unpacking and getting our children settled into their new schools and routine, that took about three weeks.
Today my husband graciously adjusted his work schedule (start later, end later) so that I could attend her morning class. I felt both nervous and excited to be jumping back into my yoga practice - it has been over two years since I actively did yoga. I was obliged to stop taking her prenatal yoga class in early 2009 when we learned that I had a placenta previa condition and needed to go on bed rest. After the pregnancy there were multiple spinal injuries to contend with so I've spent most of the last year in physical therapy and seeing a new chiropractor...
What a joy then to be back in a studio with my mat and my favorite teacher, stretching and preparing to allow my body to move in ways it has not done in a very long time. My yoga instructor Jana* is a strong, positive German woman who supports her young son through the teaching of yoga. I know from conversations with her in years past that yoga is both her passion and her livelihood.
Apparently in the two years that have passed since last we interacted, she sustained a serious injury to her spine that left doctors telling her, "You absolutely need surgery, and even with it you may have many problems for the rest of your life." She did not accept their negativity or limited vision for what her future might hold, instead dedicating herself to the study of yoga for healing back injuries. She is now well on her way to total healing and moving just as fluidly as ever she did when I knew her before.
I love stories like this. It is so powerfully inspiring to see first-hand how she took the lemons that life had thrust suddenly upon her and made lemonade. She turned to her own inner strength and spirituality and did the hard work both physically and mentally to get herself back to top performance. They say there is an incredible mind/body connection and when I hear stories about people managing to heal themselves from shattering injuries, I can't help but believe it.
Yoga for 'happy' backs turns out to mean a lot of really positive stretching and gentle poses designed to elongate the spine and decompress areas that have squished together, such as in the case of a herniation. Several of these poses are performed on a special yoga wall where you stick straps into the wall with heavy metal balls and then hook them into a very sturdy belt, so that you can do all kinds of contortions while putting your full weight into the belt and allowing the wall to hold you.
I've never seen anything like it and some of the first-timers in the class in their fifties and sixties were a little intimidated, unsure if they were ready to strap themselves into what looked like a tightrope walking harness. I guess I've got a little bit more of a devil-may-care attitude because despite being at least thirty years younger than the oldest member of the class I was the only person present with circulation so bad in my legs, my feet were snow white the entire time - barely any blood flow. Lately I figure I might as well take risks and have fun because life is unpredictable and it isn't worth wasting time living in fear.
So, I hooked right up into the funky belt/strap combination and walked right up the wall, hanging upside down with my body in an L shape. Picture my feet right on the side of the wall with my back stretched out parallel to the ground, then a bend at my hips so that my head is touching the ground... except that rather than touching the ground with my head, I've got my arms crossed and I'm holding my elbows in my hands, so I'm actually hanging in mid air with nothing touching a hard surface except my feet that are halfway up the wall. (I will try to find a picture to demonstrate). The purpose of the activity is to stretch out the spine and lengthen the spaces between the vertebrae.
I've got to say, there is a funny kind of clarity that comes to a person while hanging upside down. Maybe because you're actively defying gravity, or perhaps because there is so much blood flowing to your head!!!
Either way, I had a small epiphany while hanging there which is that I was actually having a ton of fun... which isn't something I'm used to feeling these days. The past five years have been so fraught with responsibility and stress (and tight finances), there hasn't been a lot of fun or laughter - other than the comic relief our children interject between their tantrums. I love having fun and it's been too long since I took real pleasure in my daily activities.
(Right now, for example, my children are at the dinner table screaming at each other and fighting over the meal I just spent an hour cooking for them... and frankly, listening to them whine and taunt each other isn't that fun.)
I wonder if I've even forgotten *how* to have fun! That's too bad, because I think having a "blast" as we used to say is probably really healthy and healing. I'm guessing body cells have a way of listening to how much joy vs. stress is being pumped into them every day. For too long now my body has had a daily diet of stress, and without even an appetizer or side dish of fun.
I've enjoyed a full day now since my yoga class and I'm feeling a bit achy, so we'll see how the ol' back responds tomorrow to my hanging extravaganza... but honestly, my soul is still just delighted. I'm already wondering when the next fun event will pop up ~ and also considering how I can weave more joy into the grind of daily living. "I feel like I'm seventeen again!" I announced when I arrived home this morning - so energetic and alive.
It's good to know that nearly twenty years later, that is still even possible.
*Name changed to protect the privacy of the person in question.
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