July 13, 2011 ~ Day 215 The Journey from A to B

For a long time I've known that my body needed more TLC. Specifically, I've been aware that in particular there are a few small glands in my body that aren't doing their job as they should - namely the thyroid and adrenals.

It isn't really a mystery why my adrenals would be so far out of whack. Certainly the lyme disease and other bacteria play a role, but more than anything the tremendous stress I've lived with for twenty years is likely to be at the root of all.

I am a Caucasian woman of middle class background with a lovely family, healthy food to eat and a roof over my head. Not to mention, for the past four years I've been a stay-at-home mother. What could I possibly have to stress about?

Oh, everything.

What it comes down to is my extremely type A personality.

If you put my husband and I into the exact same situation, we respond to it 100% differently. I am anxious, frustrated and fearful. He is completely relaxed.

For example -

When one of our kids gets sick. Starts screaming in the middle of the night. Vomiting, feverish, crying.

I'm up all night, taking his or her temperature, giving medicine, talking to the after hours nurse. I sit next to the ill child and cuddle them. There is no possible way I can let my body sleep, I'm so full of worry.

My husband? Not so much. "He'll be fine," he mumbles, and then rolls over and falls back to sleep. He can sleep through crying, vomiting, diarrhea. He can sleep through earthquakes, loud noises. The guy is amazing. He can sleep peacefully through just about anything!

Typically, my husband turns out to be 100% right.

By morning, our child's fever has broken, vomiting has stopped, and they're well on the mend. He or she will take a morning nap and awaken feeling much improved.

I however, will be exhausted for the rest of the day; sometimes for several days to come.

All of this takes its toll on the adrenals. When you live on adrenalin for long enough, it can really wear a body down.

I've known this for ages, but with three small kids I just haven't known how to create a stress-free life.

Now though, I am recognizing that figuring out a healthier lifestyle isn't optional anymore. My bloodwork shows that this prolonged stress is taking a significant toll. I actually have to DO it. I actually have to teach myself how to be laid back and more relaxed.

So, I've decided upon a new project: The Adrenal Project... also known as The Happy Healing Project.

I've got to figure out how to go from Type A to Type B.

"A Type A individual [is] ambitious, aggressive, business-like, controlling, highly competitive, impatient, preoccupied with his or her status, time-conscious, and tightly-wound. People with Type A personalities are often high-achieving "workaholics" who multi-task, push themselves with deadlines, and hate both delays and ambivalence."

(Thanks, Wikipedia... for confirming what everyone who has ever known me already knows! LOL!)

Alternatively, "People with Type B personalities are generally patient, relaxed, easy-going, and at times lacking an overriding sense of urgency. Because of these characteristics, Type B individuals are often described as apathetic and disengaged by individuals with Type A or other personality types."

Um, yep!

I really do get frustrated sometimes by what I perceive to be apathy. I'm so uber-A, I like a focused discussion, an intense connection.

How then, to turn the tables?

How to become more patient, relaxed and easygoing?

(If only they'd passed the California marijuana laws... LOL.)

I wish there was a quick, easy fix to this. I suspect, though, that it is going to take time. You can't just turn an apple into an orange overnight. There are so many ways to stress... and I'm so good at it ;-) Especially when it comes to raising my kids and dealing with their tantrums, I really need help chilling out.

I'm open to feedback so if any of my friends or readers have suggestions (that don't require money) to develop a more laid back, relaxed response to life - I'd love to hear them! For now, I think I have to realize that it's okay to do a "B" quality job; everything doesn't have to be perfect all of the time.

With my husband out of town for several days and the three kiddos on my own, I'm guessing I'm going to have plenty of time to practice decompressing and approaching intense situations more gracefully.

My current goals are to get outdoors with the kids at least 1 hour every day, get exercise, go to sleep 2 hours earlier than I have been doing for months... and to try to laugh more. I don't laugh nearly enough, and it shows.

I am sending the world much love today, and hoping for the best!
Wish me luck and I'll happily report back on my progress.